“Learn to light a candle in the darkest moments of someone’s life. Be the light that helps others see; it is what gives life its deepest significance.” – Roy T. Bennet

Posts tagged ‘world’

Rewards

What parent doesn’t want to tell their child, “you’re the best,” or “you can do anything”?

Giving out trophies en mass teaches children that they don’t need to strive for anything to be rewarded.

And when we tell our kids that they deserve the world and the world doesn’t give them anything – they shout in frustration and wallow in loneliness and lash out.

We tell them to ignore the “haters” because they are better than them. We put one above and one below and lose equal standing.

Here we create their superiority complexes.

So then a child believes themselves to be a god and can control who stays and who goes and doesn’t understand the consequences.

(In hindsight – they understand. They always do. And then they end themselves to keep from facing reality.)

But we have created this. Us, the domineering parents. The ones whose children can do no wrong, can be the best, can ignore all else.

We cannot ignore the warning signs. We cannot give our children the world because it is not ours to give. We can teach them to treat others as equals, and to love the bullies and the loners and the popular kids. There doesn’t need to be a hierarchy in our schools or in their minds.

(There can be winners and losers in games because that is healthy competition and they can strive to be the best of their own selves.)

But if our children are handed ribbons for participation, when they are dropped into the real world they will have nothing.

And their minds cannot coincide with reality because they still believe they are the best. And so it continues…and they suffer…and others suffer.

Because we didn’t get a trophy when we were their age.

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Scoliosis


This isn’t normally something I like to show other people. I’ve tried to train myself into accepting every part of me, but when it comes to my back I like to ignore it. I don’t like seeing my awkward bend and I hate the feeling of tight shirts on my protruding rib cage. When I sit in the company of others I sit as tall as possible. When my husband captures pictures of my back, I normally delete them. 

The above photo makes me cringe, makes me sit up straight. I don’t like seeing my flaws so front and center. Once when I was stretching, my brother went, “Uggh! Your back!” That hurt more than it should have, because it is part of me, and not something I can ever change without surgery.

A few facts about scoliosis:

-Scoliosis is about 10 times more likely to occur in women than it is in men. 

-Usain Bolt – you know, fastest sprinter on the planet – has scoliosis. I’m curious what sort of stretches he does for the pain.

-Hitler viewed scoliosis as a disability and ran his freaky experiments on people with scoliosis, which absolutely terrible and terrifying.

Back to what I was saying. I hope that someday I’ll see this as just something that makes me stronger. It’s painful, especially when carrying a baby around and trying to sleep comfortably, but as long as I exercise and don’t sit too long, I can function just fine with it.

If you have any sort of insecurity about your body, I encourage you to talk about it and try to accept it as part of you. We’re all flawed humans and sometimes our flaws really do make us stronger or more interesting or simply just…us. We are as different as leaves on trees or blades of grass. We are tall, short, round, straight, curved, uneven, and everything else in between, and there is no problem with any of that.

Take Oceans With You

take oceans with you

so you don’t run dry

paper all around you

fold and fly

don’t waste the world

don’t change the sky

 

brother wake life has begun

and go to sleep with one eye shut

you don’t want to miss a

single thing

 

take pictures with you

so you don’t lose touch

daydreams are better

but that’s enough

don’t waste the sights

don’t change the lights

 

brother wake life has begun

don’t you want to see it all?

you’ve never walked upon this earth

you shouldn’t waste a

second more

Childhood

We caught the rainstorms

We danced in raindrops

We found the rainbow

More colorful that most

Our conversations

Like sand and water

Don’t go but then again

They compliment each other

They compliment each other

~

The day’s eventful

The night is grateful

The world seems to laugh

But not at us

Life is amazing

Nothing is crazy but

Both of our grins

And honesty

Honesty

~

We gave our heart’s up

Then told nobody

We liked the way it was

So secret and secure

You had the treehouse

I had the swingset

Now we are grown and gone

The promise safe with me

The promise safe with me

© 2011 singinthebreeze.wordpress.com

Blindfolds

Since the dawn of time, life has been this crazy mix-up. Everyone is walking around with blindfolds on their eyes. Can you picture it? Stumbling and falling over each other, and jumping to try and get through the doorways, hitting their heads and laying in the streets with bruises in their minds. Where exactly is everyone going? Since the dawn of dawn we’ve been trying to figure it all out, but everywhere we looks becomes a dead end. People are crowded on every corner, yelling and adding the chaos of the scrambling. We dodge them, mostly. It’s a very hard thing to do. Thousands go opposite directions, hands out to keep from colliding. Have you ever thought that maybe….maybe they aren’t really going anywhere? They think they have meaning but it is nothing. They have feet that get them places, and help them run away. They always go somewhere. Then they go somewhere else. And somewhere else.

And somewhere else.

 

Thinking

I absolutely hate it

When I have nothing left to say

Or when my voice is silenced

In the busyness of day

And when I take my pen up

To force some random thing

It comes out in a sonnet

Of how my world has been

All my thoughts on clouds and lava

And strange reflecting Coca-Cola

How ocean photos turn out funny

And people’s laughs forever change

And I wonder where I am

In relation to the leaders

Of the country I was born to

Of the state from whence I came

Have you garbage in your city?

Have you lights that blow to bits?

I have shirts that bear stains proudly

And bread I eat turns green too fast

Yet life is for much more than comfort

And poems I’ve composed myself

But since no one likes a know-it-all

I’ll let you figure out the rest

 

 

 

 

 

 

Meant To Be

standing with your feet a foot

away from the door

fist held high and poised behind

waiting to touch

but gaining entrance means you have

to tell who you are

but how could you do such a thing

when you don’t know yourself?

and how do you explain away

the blood on your hands?

and the knife you hid inside your coat

you’ve forgotten about?

~

her fingers intertwined she’s looking

down the road again

she lives to please and satisfy

the world she’s been given

but when alone she fears the dark

and those hiding in it

and kneeling down beside the mess

cries, “Father, forgive me.”

but how could she explain it all away

when she’s been caught red-handed?

and judged by every watching eye

would there be any point in it?

~

still you need a place to rest

unseen by the masses

one loud knock to break the silence

and enter another

she opens up her home to you

and you hide under the baskets

and one heart tells the other one

“I understand why.”

there’s no need to explain away

the guilt in your being

and the envy of a fuller life

when it was meant to be

© 2011 singinthebreeze.wordpress.com

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